A New Day

It appears I dropped off the face of earth…swallowed up for days on end, when suddenly, roughly, Gaia spit me back out…

Let me take a moment to tell you what has happened since April.  There was a family wedding; there were illnesses, a new job in another state, traveling back and forth to find an affordable home to live in, packing, packing and more packing.     Then there was the move, followed by unpacking and more unpacking.

Then it happened.

The WALL.   A big cement wall, placed directly between my mind and my pen.  There were no words.   Nothing.  I was empty and couldn’t write.   The block was quite immense, and I am still working my way out of it.  No longer on the rough shores of Lake Superior, there was no place I could escape to, no place where the words would just pour out of me while waves crashed into sandy shores.     No howling winds whipping specks of sand and rock into my skin, embedding me with their timelessness.  It felt like a part of me had been torn off and left behind, and I have only just realized this.

While mourning my loss, I forgot to look at the new beauty that now surrounds me.   Slowly, a tapestry of colors, bright and faded, began to fill my mind.    Hues of life began to swirl around me, holding me tight as Gaia wrapped her strong arms around mine.

I’m on a road of discovery, one that promises to be rich in lore and wisdom.    I know who I am.   I am strong woman.  I am a mother and a wife.  I am confident, wise and powerful in my own right.   Wise.  Powerful.  Strong.  I am not on this road to drive fast.  I am here to walk – to saunter – to learn all I can.   To absorb.  To follow the path of ancestors who long departed this earth, yet still remain, their quiet and steady whispers making their way to my ears.

Awakenings are never easy, and they should never be expected to be.  But as I fill my free moments with books and journals, I can feel the earth move beneath me, swelling like a great pregnant belly.  Last night’s Harvest Moon remained behind the clouds throughout the night, but her strength filled me with a calming peace.

The WALL is crumbling.

We shall see where this takes me.   Enjoy the journey.

© Tara E. Wisnewski Janisch and Rugged Earth Blessings, 2012-2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of original poems, essays and photographs without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.

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